Books that have had an impact on me

I recently gave a talk to my colleagues in Liverpool about my career. Not for self aggrandisement, but since they asked me, as a change from my regular talks on technical matters; and I was requested to include pointers to help my colleagues’ careers.

Giving the talk was a very rewarding experience: it seemed to be enjoyed, but the icing on the cake was that several people asked to see me afterwards to discuss further certain matters, and I also got a number of emails asking me to elaborate certain points.

A common request was to give more details or a list of some of the books that had influenced me; so I thought I would blog about them. This is my first blog, and there is no better place to start than the book which has had more impact on my career than all other books put together, Dale Carnegie’s How to Win Friends and Influence People.

The title sounds rather naff today, but reflects the time it was written, 1936; and mustn’t put people off. There is a twenty first century version (which I have on my iPad, but have not read yet) which is meant to update the text to today’s language and also email, social networks and so forth; but the 1936 edition is timeless in its principles.

The book, and the course I did with Dale Carnegie Associates, at the end of my 20s, brought me out of my shell and gave me increased confidence. I have used its principles continually since then. I whole heartedly recommend it.

I think there is no better time than this blog to acknowledge one of the people who helped me significantly in my career: I have or will mention others from time to time, but Joe Swift was the partner who showed sufficient confidence in me to agree that the firm should pay half of my course fees. I had to pay half, a not inconsiderable sum, but through Joe, himself a Dale Carnegie believer, the firm supported me. After six or so weeks, half way through the course, Joe called me in to his office, and told me the firm would in fact reimburse me for my share of the costs: I have never asked him, but think a ‘trick’ was played on me: to see whether I would stick the course (there was a drop out rate, it being quite an ordeal for chronically shy people like I was); and once I had showed commitment, I was reimbursed. Thank you, Joe, for taking the risk and backing me.

How to win friends is a light read; summaries are available on the Internet, and I have a copy of the distillation of the book, the Golden Principles, on my shelf at work, and another copy in my briefcase, at all times: I have done since 1993. I think it is both relevant for every day life and also for people like me in the service industry. Professional life is all about serving others, trust and honesty.

Whilst How to win friends wouldn’t be very useful if I were in Robinson Crusoe’s position, and if I were on Desert Island Discs I would probably choose another book to take with ( no prizes for guessing on which subject, nor what my luxury would be), it is a book which I whole heartedly recommend. If further support is needed, I have Tom a copy when he was eighteen, and a few days later, I caught him in the lounge reading it…and he read it from cover to cover.

The course concluded with a gala evening where all the participants had to invite guests along: I know it was 1993 since Jane couldn’t come, being heavily pregnant with Tom, so instead my best man, Paul, and his wife Jo, came along. We had to do two three minute speeches: one prepared, one from a subject drawn literally out of a hat on stage, with then only the seconds you could bare to think what to say. One of my proudest achievements was that that evening I won the audience’s prize for best impromptu speech: the topic was the one word written in the piece of paper I drew out: fish.

Posted with Blogsy