My new GCSE: and the advantages of private education

Exam period is upon us chez Beardsworth; daughter number 1 has just finished her A levels; D#2 her exams too, and on Sunday, I got an A* in the 2009 GCSE ICT paper. Let me explain.

We are lucky enough to back on to the lovely Bramall Park, so Charlie and I are constantly in there. I think I know every pathway and nook and cranny: you can't beat dog-walking for local knowledge. Alas, part of my make up is to pick up litter, and on Sunday I picked up the above GCSE paper, which someone had clearly tried to do (tried being the operative word).

I couldn't help myself but have a look. Question one was half a dozen pictures, one mark each for identifying the items, monitor, keyboard, mouse, scanner (a toughie); question two, one mark each, was to say which were input devices, which output devices. And so it went on. I liked the unknown candidates answer to 'name two things other than name which you would put on an input questionnaire for a sports club database'. His or her answer was 'surname', leaving the second space blank. I suspect the exam standards board will come down hard on the examiner since 'name' did not say 'first and surname'.

Probably ten minutes later, perhaps less, I had my A*, 100%.

Now for the benefits of private education. HEALTH WARNING: if you are a parent of a child who you are thinking of putting through private education, DO NOT READ ON.

D#1 has had the benefit of a dozen or so years of private education, costing her parents £100,000 or more. If the said parents of pre-private-school children are reading this, despite the health warning, be warned that school fees inflation has exceeded RPI considerably, so the £100,000 would now be a low figure.

But can D#1 put the dishwasher on unaided?

Not entirely.

D#1 is at home, relaxing after her exams; at the risk of exposing the dirty linen (actually, crockery) of 22 Carrwood Road, sometimes her parents rush out to work and forget to switch the machine on. But would we be confident that D#1 would spot the tell tale signs, such as a full dishwasher, some things lying on the surfaces….? Let us say that we wouldn't have absolute full confidence. So, text to D#1 saying please put the dishwasher on.

Text reply, 'Yep, what button do you press?'

The clue, is that there is one button with an ! sign on the left hand side, alone, and several buttons on the right hand side with symbols which look like wash cycles.

Maybe, in this age of TV remote controls, Neff should produce a dishwasher remote control for the next generation of home owners. Or, better, an iPhone app. Come to think of it, if there was an iPhone app, parents could switch on the dishwashers without having to rely on their at home children. If such a thing comes out, then remember that you read about it first here.

Hopefully D#2 will read this blog and also take note…

Posted with Blogsy